Part 32: He Loves Me

 When I saw Elder Jensen after the chaos in Idaho, it was in the parking lot of a stadium in Abbotsford. We had arranged to say goodbye before he left for Guyana in a few days. Missionaries have to travel in pairs, so he had swindled an easy going Elder to come chaperone us, but was going to give us some space. I liked that Elder Jensen wanted to talk to me in person and not just over text. He wasn't shy to admit to others that he wanted to say goodbye to me and that he cared for me. This Elder that came with him had caught on to what was going on a little while ago. We were at a basketball game, Elder Jensen walked away and the other Elder came over to me and said, "You love him, don't you?" At the time, I kind of just laughed. Love is a strong word, I didn't know how I felt yet but I know that I had been burnt by jerks a few too many times and had my guard up. Since then, there had been too many moments I couldn't ignore. I had fallen in love with him.

 The Elders parked, and I pulled up to the parking lot. Elder Jensen got out and the other Elder stayed in the car. Once I parked, I literally ran to him and hugged him tightly. It was our first hug, since it was technically against the rules to touch or have any sort of relationship at all. That's why we were waiting until he was out of this mission to tell each other how we felt. 

He was great at hugging. It felt natural. I hadn't hugged anyone romantically since Hans and hugging Elder Jensen strangely felt familiar, and comforting. That was really all there was to it. We had to keep it just friendly and quick. So I wished him luck and drove away. I think I cried the entire way home. I knew how I felt. I was in love with him, and he was in love with me. 

We messaged back and forth a bit over the next day. I think we were both getting nervous but also excited about our upcoming conversation. We had decided that once he had been dropped off at the airport and was waiting at the gate, he would call me and we would talk about everything. I thought I had been in love before, but this was a feeling I had never experienced for anyone before. I wanted to do anything and everything for him. He was all that mattered. I wanted to be with him all the time and if I thought about it too much, I felt like I would actually explode. I never felt that way about Gaston. This feeling was strong and powerful. I loved him. It reminded me of a cheesy, but meaningful quote by the one and only Zac Efron: "When you're young everything feels like the end of the world. But it's not; it's just the beginning. You might have to meet a few more jerks, but one day you're gonna meet a boy who treats you the way you deserve to be treated. Like the sun rises and sets with you"

The night before Elder Jensen and I get to have our conversation, Jill and Holly went to the high school for an event. At about 9:30pm, I got a call from Jill's boyfriend saying that Jill passed out at the event, she was hyperventilating and there was also an intruder in the school. I had no idea where my parents were so I got in the car and drove to the school. Luckily it was about a 2 minute drive from my parents house to the high school. When I got there, I didn't really want to go in if there was an intruder in the school, but I had to save my sisters. It turns out, the boyfriend was exaggerating about the intruder. It was just someone with a backpack that nobody knew, and the teacher was serious about it, looking into it and asking around. But Jill was apparently still passing out somewhere. I found her on the floor surrounded by people, no adults. I don't really remember how things unfolded here. I know there was an ER visit for Jill afterwards, and she lived to tell the tale. Maybe I should ask her what ended up happening.

-

5:00am the next morning, I had my sound on so I would be woken up to a text from Elder Jensen. He was going to text me when he crossed security and then call me when he got to the gate. I had a whole script in my head of what was going to be said, but he had convinced me to let him talk first. He was right on schedule and his text says he'll call in 5 minutes. This is it. This is what I've been waiting for. When the phone rings, it isn't a phone call like I'm expecting, it's a Facetime call. Did I mention it was 5:00am? I was not done up, I was in my pajamas and I woke up 5 minutes ago. He had never seen me in this state, but I answered anyway. On the other side of the Facetime call was the cutest boy I've ever seen. He was bright eyed, bushy tailed and had the biggest smile on his face. "Good morning!" he said with the utmost enthusiasm. I couldn't help but smile back. We hum and haw about how quiet the airport is in the morning and what time I have to be at Kosmetae for school and who my clients are for the day. About two minutes into the call, he goes "So..." This is it. 

I remember bits and pieces. I remember all of the important parts. I remember him opening with, "I hope you know how much I like you" then it's a bit blurry, then his closing line I remember so clearly I can hear his voice saying it in my head, "I'm in love with you." 

When my turn came, he had basically said all that I wanted to say. But look at this guy, he deserved a speech. It's a good thing that I had pre wrote out all of my feelings over the past few months that I couldn't tell anyone out loud. I told him that I loved him too. The part that we had to discuss, was what we were going to do about this, since he was leaving for 8 months and we didn't know what that would look like. I told him that I would love to stay in contact (the understatement of the century) and that I was planning on not dating anyone else while he was gone. I was going to wait for him. He was obviously very happy to hear this. Since we didn't know what the mission in Guyana would be like, this could mean that we wouldn't talk for 8 months. But I was willing to wait for this guy. He was beyond worth it. 

His flight called for boarding, we told each other that we loved each other and said goodbye. It would be goodbye for awhile, and I was devastated. But I was in love with Brody Jensen, and he was in love with me. This was all I had ever wanted, and it was just at my fingertips, I just had to wait a little bit.