Part 33: I Want To Marry Your Son, By The Way

Brody and I hadn't talked for three days, which was the longest we had ever been apart. I had so much I wanted to tell him. I still hadn't told him about how badly Gaston had hurt me, or how badly Hans had hurt me. I wanted him to know since both of those were pretty big things to happen in my life. I hadn't been able to tell him I loved him for three days, it felt like forever. We knew that his new mission president might be strict and not let us talk at all. That would mean we would only be able to talk every once and awhile, and the idea of that made me really sad. 

About three days after Brody got to Guyana, I got an email from him. On Mondays, missionaries typically sent out weekly emails to their families and friends. But I got a special email from him that was just sent to me. We had talked about sending each other voice memos instead of written out emails so we could hear each other's voices. Hearing his voice made me cry. I had previously mentioned that I was going to Calgary to see Kaitlyn next month, and in his voice memo, he was telling me about all of the fun things I should do when I get out there. I had also expressed to him in my voice memo that I was worried he was going to change his mind about me, since we weren't going to see each other for months. When he responded back to me, he expressed that he had a similar concern about me, but that his mind was made up and that he loved me a lot. I still couldn't believe that this was real. 

-

When I had gone on my road trip through Calgary and Lethbridge the year prior, my dad had arranged for one of his childhood friends to take us in for a few nights in Calgary. That's when I met the James family. Now fast forward almost a year, I had stayed in touch with the oldest daughter, Kaitlyn. We had become pretty close and talked quite often, so I had arranged to go back to Calgary to spend some time with her. The James family had mentioned I could stay with them when I moved to Calgary. This was a huge deal since I was on a budget and I really liked the idea of living with a family after I move away from mine. I took this time to get to know them and I quickly realized what a fun bunch they were. 

Since I was going to be in Calgary that weekend, Brody suggested I meet his mom for lunch, and Kaitlyn and I set up a time for her to pick me up. Brody had been gone for just over a month at this point. Luckily, we messaged back and forth sporadically and still sent our voice memos on Mondays. The idea of meeting his mom made me nervous, mainly because I knew not everybody would be on board with our interesting situation. But if she was going to be my future mother-in-law, I knew I had to make a really good first impression. I couldn't just walk up to her and be like, "I want to marry your son, by the way."

I was nervous, but I could tell right off the bat that this woman loves her son and wanted what was best for him. I got the sense that she didn't want me to ruin Brody's experience for him. I can't blame her; you send your child on a mission because you want them to get the most out of it, not because you want them to message girls and fall in love. But here we are. She and I got lunch, walked the mall and before I left, she hugged me goodbye and said she would tell Brody that we had connected. I just hoped I had made a good impression. 

Within the last few hours of my trip to Calgary, Brody and I get to chatting and we decided to deep dive about all of our trauma. I knew it had to be done, and I trusted him. I was getting serious about him, so I thought it would be important for him to know about how Gaston and Hans had hurt me. I thought it would help him understand me a bit better. He was understanding, as he always was. He offered to go egg Gaston’s house and told me he loved me. That was all I needed to hear. 

I had never been in a relationship with someone who had exes. I mean Hans had multiple relationships at once but I can't really compare the two. I didn't really react the way I should have when Brody told me about his past relationships, especially since he had been so cool about mine. But nonetheless, I was a very insecure girl with a lot of baggage. I sat in the Calgary airport and cried thinking about how to navigate what I was feeling. I didn't think I could ever be enough for him. I knew I wouldn't leave him but I didn't know what to do with myself. The next few days were hard, but I realized that any feelings he had for me were way stronger than any feelings he had for his girlfriends in high school. I think that was the moment where I knew for sure that Brody loved me. 


Brody in Guyana (2022)






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